Non-Punitive Discipline Techniques

Discipline doesn't have to mean punishment. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, parents should use positive methods of discipline, rather than punitive ones, to change or redirect children's behaviors. Using non-punitive discipline techniques doesn't mean that you are a softy or too easy-going of a parent. Instead, the experts agree that non-punitive measures are the most effective ways to parent.

  1. Paying Attention

    • The AAP suggests that paying attention to your child on a regular basis is one of the easiest ways to encourage positive behaviors. When you're looking for a non-punitive way to keep your child on the straight and narrow, try paying more attention to her. Ignoring a child, or withholding attention, may cause the child to act out or engage in misbehaviors in order to catch an adult's eye. For younger kids paying attention means watching the child during daily activities such as building with blocks, painting a picture or playing at the park. For older kids and teens this may take the form of engaging in daily discussions about school, extracurricular activities and social or peer issues.

    Rewards and Praise

    • While you may only think of discipline as stopping unwanted, or bad, behaviors; rewarding the positive ones -- according to the AAP -- is a highly effective strategy. For example, when your 5 year old uses his words to expresses his feelings of frustration instead of throwing a temper tantrum, verbally praise his positive behavior. This reward, in the form of praise, will encourage a repeat performance the next time that he has the opportunity to misbehave. Likewise, you may want to give your child a concrete reward such as a star sticker when he demonstrates appropriate behaviors.

    Time Out

    • The "time out" is a long-standing technique that is -- when you use it in the correct way -- non-punitive in nature. This strategy typically works best with children in the early childhood stage, including toddlers, preschoolers and kindergartners. When your child misbehaves or has an emotional outburst, remove her from the situation and place her on time out in a quiet spot that is free from distractions. The child development experts at the Kids Health website recommend that parents use one minute of time out per each year of the child's age. Time outs give your child the chance to calm down, think about what she is doing and stop her unwanted behavior.

    Natural Consequences

    • What happens to your 11-year-old when he decides to watch TV -- even though you have told him not to -- and doesn't study for his vocabulary test? Chances are that he is going to get a failing grade. If your older child or teen refuses to listen to or follow your requests, try using natural consequences as a non-punitive discipline technique. According to the Kids Health website, using natural consequences for children over age 9 as a discipline strategy can help children to learn valuable life lessons. By suffering the consequences of their actions, kids can change their behaviors without you actually punishing them.

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