Top Characteristics of Successful Parenting

Limits

• Your child must know from her earliest years that you have set and will enforce limits. The limits may be for safety or politeness, but they are all important to your child̵7;s well-being. Children thrive on consistency and routine, and when they know how far they can go and what the consequences are if they venture beyond the limits, their lives are more routine, organized and peaceful. Discipline your child in such a way that he knows that you love him but that sends a clear signal that you are in charge and that you will enforce the rules. Avoid requiring your child to always obey your every word, however. Concentrate your discipline on the big issues like lying and hurting other people.

Modeling

• Model the behavior and attitudes that you want your child to have. When something goes wrong in your day, try to find something good about it. Discuss out loud when you are sad or upset about something, but try to frame it in a positive way. This can help your child see that expressing negative feelings is OK if it is done in a productive way. The ability to look at bad situations in a positive light helps model stress management, according to a citation of the 2010 research of Psychologists Robert Epstein and Shannon Fox, his collaborator, in a Psychology Today article. Also, when you make a mistake, confess it and apologize. Setting the example for apologizing and recognizing mistakes will set your child up for future success in relationships as an adult.

Play

• Play with your child. A Parents.com article lists this as one of the 50 ways to be a good parent. Do things with your child that he enjoys doing, not what you want to do. If you can̵7;t play at a particular moment, talk with your child while you work, if possible. While you are grocery shopping, for example, pretend that you are superheroes flying down a couple of the aisles or that you are on a roller coaster together as you push the cart fast. Being present with your child mentally and physically is important to building a strong relationship, and a strong relationship is evidence of successful parenting. Susan Ward, of Adoption.com, states that the ability to have fun and be silly will help you maintain your sanity and go a long way to building a powerful relationship with your child.

Parental Instinct

• One of the greatest gifts a parent has is instinct. When you have listened to the experts and read different articles on how to raise your kids, the most important thing you can do to be a successful parent is to parent in a way that is aligned with your instinct about what is good for your child, says Lisa Zamosky, writing for WebMd. Show your child that you have convictions and that you will stick with them to raise him the way that seems best to you. Be open to change, however. Avoid getting so caught up in raising your kid how your values dictate that you miss unintended harm or a better way to do things that comes along.