How to Raise Young Children During a Military Deployment

Deployment is rarely easy for a military family, but the impact can be especially difficult for children due to lack of understanding, anxiety and even anger. As you parent young children during a deployment, your challenges will be many. Your youngsters̵7; lives will have flipped upside down with the absence of one parent due to the deployment. The ensuing result of this upheaval can create a strong need for reassurance and consistency to help kids navigate the situation.

Instructions

    • 1

      Listen and talk every day with your kids during deployment, advises the American Academy of Pediatrics' HealthyChildren.org website. Kids will have ongoing fears, worries, random thoughts, questions and concerns about a variety of issues, including fear of abandonment, fear for the deployed parent̵7;s safety and questions about the future. Tune in to your child and make yourself available for answering questions and alleviating fears, as often as necessary.

    • 2

      Maintain a consistent daily routine for your kids to create a sense of normalcy, advises Zero to Three, a nonprofit organization that supports the development of young children. Consistency also provides structure, which helps increase your child̵7;s security.

    • 3

      Discipline consistently, in accordance with the preexisting family rules that were in place before the deployment. By maintaining expectations, you help your children feel more secure and comfortable, even during the time of upheaval.

    • 4

      Provide positive activities that will help keep your kids busy during the deployment. Play dates, extracurricular school activities, holiday parties, extended family visits and weekend excursions can help to distract children from anxiety. Resist the urge to overschedule your youngsters, however, cautions the AAP. Scheduling so many activities that your youngsters feel overwhelmed and anxious can be counterproductive and harmful.

    • 5

      Protect your kids from situations that could cause worry, fear and anxiety. For example, observing you crying or overhearing an adult conversation about the deployment can lead to unnecessary fears and anxiety, according to physician Ian Shaffer, author of ̶0;Young Heroes: Preparing Military Kids for a Parent̵7;s Deployment.̶1; It̵7;s appropriate to tell your kids if you̵7;re feeling sad or worried, but model appropriate coping skills so your emotions don̵7;t frighten your kids. Shelter your children from news and current events reports to avoid your kids learning about potentially frightening developments they might not understand fully.

    • 6

      Help your children maintain contact with the deployed parent as much as possible. Telephone conversations, computer chatting, writing letters, taking pictures and keeping a family journal are examples of ways your kids can stay connected with the absent parent.

    • 7

      Watch for indications that your kids might need extra help and support during a deployment. Explosive behavior, dropping grades, a change in eating or sleeping habits and escalating emotions, including both sadness and anger, can indicate a possible problem. Seek assistance from your child̵7;s healthcare provider and explore support groups in which your youngsters could interact with other kids in deployment situations.

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