How to Co-parent

Understand that co-parenting means that you must set aside your differences as partners and resolve to work together as parents in the best interest of your child or children.

Know that you will continue to disagree, but agree that you will not let your own differences interfere with your ability to parent together.

Make rules for yourselves as parents. Set up a parenting schedule you will follow. Have a procedure you will follow in order to make changes to the schedule. Decide which parent will be responsible for setting up the child's sports schedule, who will schedule doctor appointments, who will shop for clothes, etc. These jobs can be shared, but they do need to be clearly designated.

Argue only when your child is not within earshot. Never speak poorly of the other parent in front of the child. You must respect the parent-child relationship they have.

Accept that even though your relationship as partners is over, your relationship as parents will continue for the rest of your life.

View co-parenting as a job and the other parent as a co-worker you may not particularly like. Do whatever you have to do to succeed at this new task.

Make important decisions about your child together. Talk about choices of schools, medical procedures and behavior problems and try to work out together what will work best for your child.

Create rules that the child must follow at both houses. Consistency is important for your child.

Show your child that although you live apart, you are all still a family. Emphasize that you will continue to be parents together.

Avoid being completely dependent on the other parent. You each need to have autonomy to make everyday decisions. Learn to let go a little and accept that the situation cannot be perfect.

Take a co-parenting class or see a co-parenting counselor. Co-parenting is a skill that must be learned, so don't be afraid to get some training.