How to Encourage Siblings to Apologize

Sharing parents and living together can set siblings up for some quarrelsome years. Developing empathy and outgoing concern for others often helps siblings get along more peacefully and can help diffuse problems when they do occur. With encouragement from you, your kids can also deliver sincere apologies to each other to mend differences. Apologizing requires humility, a valuable social skill.

Instructions

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      Build the capacity for empathy in your children to help them think about and care how others feel. Teach your kids about feelings and then gradually expand the concept by recognizing that other people have similar feelings, including siblings.

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      Cultivate a strong bond with each of your children. A strong connection between parents and children improves siblings' relationships with each other, advises Gillian Ragsdale, Ph.D., writing for Psychology Today.

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      Demonstrate apologizing to others for your children to see whenever appropriate to help them learn this social skill, suggests the Ask Dr. Sears website. By setting an example of resolving conflict with a caring approach, your children will learn this skill and are likely to follow your example.

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      Teach children the importance of resolving conflicts when they occur, advises the Lucy Daniels Center, a nonprofit mental health service. Whenever someone̵7;s behavior or action causes hurt or harm to someone else, it̵7;s important to use empathy to realize that someone else is hurting and then care enough to make amends with an apology. For example, if one child receives a bump during play and a younger brother caused the bump, a conflict might ensue. If little brother quickly says he̵7;s sorry, the conflict likely diffuses and play can continue peacefully.

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      Encourage your children to show forgiveness as the other side of the apology process. When apologizing resolves the conflict and the apologizer feels forgiveness, apologizing usually feels like a positive relief. By not holding grudges, your children can move past the conflict and keep negative feelings from festering. Forgiveness might sound like ̶0;No problem̶1; or ̶0;That̵7;s okay.̶1;

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      Remember that you cannot force the emotional remorse that should accompany a sincere apology, but you can encourage it and lay the groundwork by helping your child develop empathy. If a child owes a sibling an apology, but is having trouble coming to the point of delivering a sincere, heartfelt apology, give the youngster some time to come to the point of apologizing sincerely. A short time-out in a bedroom to think might help a child cool off and realize that he owes an apology.

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