Consequences for Poor Sportsmanship for Kids

Basics

• Before you start dishing out the discipline on the sports field, it's essential that your child understands what good sportsmanship is and why it is necessary during team play. Although teens should already have a grasp on what it means to have good sportsmanship, your younger child may not understand this concept yet. He may even confuse the competitive nature of sports with acting aggressively or having a mean attitude toward other kids on an opposing team. The child development experts at PBS Parents note that you should explain good sportsmanship in easy-to-understand words that are age-appropriate for your child. Instead of going into a diatribe on the ins and outs of social dynamics and formal etiquette, stick with the basics. Tell your child that, on the sports field -- just like at school, at home or on the playground -- he needs to treat other children as he would want them to treat him.

Removal

• When poor sportsmanship rears its ugly head on the field, one of the prime consequences to enact is a one-time removal. For example, if your child trips over an opposing player's foot on the soccer field, and then proceeds to spout out insults or kick the other child, a swift removal is a firm consequence that will show her the error of her ways. Keep in mind that you, as the parent, may not have the authority to remove your child from the situation. You may need to defer to the coach's decisions or speak to the coach about removing your child as a necessary consequence. After your child is ejected from the game, speak with her -- when she is calm -- about her actions. Ask her how she thinks that other child felt when she insulted, kicked or acted out toward her.

At-Home Discipline

• If the consequences for poor sportsmanship on the field don't do the trick, keep the discussion going at home. While your child's team captain or coach should certainly lay down the law on the field, don't leave every teachable moment up to another adult. Take on some of the responsibility when providing consequences for poor sportsmanship and discipline your rule breaker at home. This doesn't mean yelling or punishment, but instead use some of the same positive techniques that you would when your little one acts out or behaves badly in everyday situations. Set clear expectations about good sportsmanship prior to your child ever stepping on the field or court. Provide age-appropriate consequences that fit the situation. For example, if your third grader comes home and starts stomping around and slamming doors after her softball team loses, take away her TV time for the day. Don't forget about at-home sportsmanship during backyard flag football or neighborhood baseball games. If you see your child acting in a negative manner -- even if it's only with her siblings -- stop her from playing and put her in timeout.

Apologizing and Respect

• Just because your child sees his favorite ball player smugly gloating when he scores a home run doesn't mean that he should follow suit. Showing respect to other players, as well as coaches and referees, is a major part of good sportsmanship. If your child chooses to insult the opposing team on their loss, instead of congratulating them on playing well, ask him to apologize. He might balk at the idea of taking back his criticism, but this is a key step in behaving with positive sportsmanship practices.