What to Do When a Child Refuses to Be Educated?

Compulsory Education

• According to the NCSL, eight states -- and the District of Columbia, the Virgin Islands and Puerto Rico -- require all child older than age 5 to attend school. Twenty-four states have a compulsory age of 6, 16 states mandate that kids 7 and older attend school and two states have a minimum age of 8 years. Roughly half of all U.S. states do allow kids ages 14 through 18 to leave school under certain conditions, such as attending a vocational school or junior college or after receiving special permission from a District Court or their local school board. Keep in mind that compulsory education doesn't always refer to attending a district public school. Going to a private school, receiving private tutoring or being home-schooled might function as an alternative method to receiving a public school education in many states.

Preschoolers

• Although, as the NCSL points out, compulsory minimum age requirements exist for attending school, your child might begin to balk at the idea of getting an education well before she reaches the elementary years. Figuring out what to do when your child refuses to go to school is largely dependent on her age. A 3-year-old who puts up a fuss at the beginning of her preschool day is quite different than a 13-year-old who cuts class in order to get out of going to middle school. If your child is below school age and refuses to go to her preschool or day care, take a step back and figure out if the sudden introduction of the educational environment is too much for her to handle. Instead of not wanting an education, your preschooler might have fears or anxiety about starting school that you can help her with. The pediatric pros at the KidsHealth website suggest that parents try some preschool-like activities at home, such as coloring or building with blocks, before the school year begins.

Grade-schoolers

• Like preschoolers, grade school-age kids might also have some fears or worries bout starting school. Discussing school, and related issues, can help your child to feel more at ease and might lessen his resistance to getting an education. Find out why your child doesn't want to go to school. He might not simply not want an education, and instead might worry about getting good enough grades, have troubles with peers or think that his teacher doesn't like him. The American Academy of Pediatrics, on its HealthyChildren website, recommends talking to your child's teacher or the principal when problems arise. The teacher, or principal, has experience dealing with kids who refuse to get an education and might have expert advice or ideas to help you encourage your child to return to school without a fight.

Teens

• Whether your teen is anxious about going to high school, is in class, is having a serious peer conflict or refuses an education in an effort to rebel against your authority, you can't simply cave in and let her drop out. Before stressing about your teen's distaste for school, start by discussing the reasons behind her refusal to be educated. The AAP suggests that parents give their teens the facts about what dropping out means when it comes to the ability to earn a sustainable income and any future aspirations. If that fails, you should move on to talking to the teachers, guidance counsel or principal. Teens who don't respond to anything that the parents or educators have to say might benefit from an accelerated program that allows them to graduate early or online classes that they take at home. If your teen does drop out, don't indulge her. Show, instead of tell, her what it's like to be an adult. Insist that she works and charge her rent or make her pay her own bills.