How to Teach Sharing

Your co-worker comes to visit, and without saying a word she grabs your cellphone, the keys to your car and takes off for a spin around the block. Welcome to a child's world of sharing. A toy truck might not seem like much to you, but, to a child, it is a personal treasure. Sharing with siblings and friends can be a difficult concept to grasp, but, with some practice, patience and praise, you can teach your kids the importance of generosity.

Instructions

  1. Building the Foundation for Generosity

    • 1

      Have realistic expectations. Sharing requires children to have a genuine awareness and concern for others, and, according to Ask Dr. Sears, children are seldom capable of true empathy younger than age 6. Expecting a toddler to always share willingly is unrealistic. This doesn't mean you can't start teaching him the value of sharing early, but it does mean it will take time for it to finally click.

    • 2

      Set an example. Children learn from their parents, so emphasize ways that you share each day. For instance, if your child asks for a bite of your snack, tell her "I would love to share my apple with you." Point out the things you share with your spouse, such as the family vehicle or space in the bathroom. Let her see how happy sharing makes you feel, and she should eventually want to do the same.

    • 3

      Encourage positive behavior. If you see your child give his truck to a friend, let him know how proud you are that he chose to share. According to Baby Center, toddlers practice sharing by "proto-sharing." They are willing to show the object to others, but they are not quite ready to let go of it. Verbally reinforce the behavior, as it is an early building block for sharing.

    • 4

      Give your child the opportunity to practice. If you are setting snack out, ask her to deliver the snack to her sibling. Let her choose a few old toys to donate to charity. Just praising the simple act of giving will allow her to feel the joy of generosity.

    • 5

      Let your child set boundaries. Although it is reasonable to expect him to share community toys at a playdate, it is also reasonable to let him put away special toys. Ask Dr. Sears recommends respecting your child's posessiveness over some things and not forcing him to share everything he has. Establish the rule that he should put away any special toys ahead of time, and any toys in the common area are fair game for friends to play with.

    • 6

      Set a timer. When two children are after the same toy, mediate by letting them each have a turn for a set amount of time. Two minutes is typically good for toddlers. If the dispute is between siblings, let the younger child have the toy first while the older child helps set the timer. When the timer goes off, it's time to switch. It might take a few times before they feel comfortable letting go, but, in time, they will see that the toy comes back. This type of sharing helps them learn delayed gratification.

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