Social & Emotional Development in Preschoolers

2 to 3 Years - Personal/Social Skills

• At this age, a child often express frustration by throwing temper tantrums. She is not able to take turns and is impatient. She tends to use physical aggression to express frustration and anger. As her verbal skills improve, aggression will diminish. She tends to be bossy, ordering adults around. She often exhibits defiant behavior, shouting "no" frequently. This negative behavior toward adults is important in developing independence. The child enjoys helping with chores at home. She will begin to show signs of empathy, comforting others who are hurt or scared.

2 to 3 Years - Play

• The 2-year-old child enjoys watching and imitating other children play. She engages in parallel play, playing alongside others but not actually with them. She is content to play alone. She enjoys dressing up in family members' clothing and imitating them. She may pretend to have an imaginary friend who is her constant companion. She may offer toys to others, but will be very possessive, even hoarding toys. She may imitate activities she has done at home, such as teaching her stuffed animals to use the potty or feeding dolls.

3 to 4 Years - Personal/Social Skills

• The 3-year-old child laughs often. He is friendly and likes to please others. He talks to himself frequently. He sometimes has nightmares and fears of the dark. He will defend his possessions and toys, becoming aggressive or hiding things. Adults should allow children to work out solutions to disagreements unless they threaten physical violence. The 3-year-old can sit and listen to stories up to 10 minutes at a time. He often shows affection toward other children, especially those who are younger or who are hurt. He may still have a special toy or blanket for security or comfort. He will respond more readily to choices than commands from adults.

3 to 4 Years - Play

• A child at this stage still often engages in parallel play, but may join in simple games and group activities for short periods of time. He appears to understand taking turns, but is not always willing to do so. He uses objects symbolically in play, pretending a bowl is a crown or a block is a car. He enjoys make-believe play alone or with others, especially dress-up activities.

4 to 5 Years - Personal/Social Skills

• The 4-year-old child has frequent and unpredictable mood changes. She is friendly and outgoing. She may hold complicated conversations and share emotions with imaginary friends. She may exaggerate the truth through made-up stories of her bravery. She is often proud of her accomplishments and is eager to gain adult approval. She wants to try things on her own. Tattling is prevalent at this stage.

4 to 5 Years - Play

• The 4-year-old child greatly enjoys make-believe and dramatic play. She begins to join in group games and activities. Playmates become more important to her; she wants to be with other children all the time. She begins to play cooperatively. She will share most of the time, but may still have times when she is "bossy" or unwilling to cooperate. She understands and needs limits, and will follow rules most of the time.