How to Teach Kids to Be Confident & Stand Up for Themselves

Raising confident children is about more than making sure they like themselves, it's about keeping them safe as well. Bullying is a common part of life for many children, with 16 percent of boys and 11 percent of girls reporting being bullied in school, according to the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services. Teaching children to stand up for themselves and have high self-esteem prepares them to deal with bullies and other negative influences. Start teaching children to be confident from the time they are toddlers so they grow up to be confident adults.

Instructions

    • 1

      Give children opportunities to do things for themselves. Let young children make their own sandwiches and pick out their own clothes. Let older children pack their own lunches and walk the dog on their own. Make safety rules whenever you're letting children do these activities, such as "No touching the knives" or "Stay where I can see you."

    • 2

      Praise children. Tell them you're proud when they try something new, even if they fail. Laugh when they tell jokes, even if they're not funny. Give them limited praise for their appearance and accomplishments and focus instead on praising their individuality and the efforts that they make.

    • 3

      Talk to your children about peer pressure and bullying. Role play ways to deal with these issues, like ignoring the person or asking a teacher or other trusted adult for help.

    • 4

      Let children try to solve their own conflicts. Stand back when children bicker or disagree. Step in if the fight escalates to make suggestions about solutions. Ask children to work out their own disputes with teachers or friends at school rather than making a call to solve them yourself, as long as these issues aren't causing your child harm.

    • 5

      Model confidence and high self-esteem. Avoid criticizing yourself and others, at least when children are in earshot. Solve your own disputes and problems by being polite, yet firm. Take on new challenges like teaching yourself to change your own oil or signing up for classes so children can see you building your own confidence.

    • 6

      Sign children up for new activities. Let children choose what type of activities they'd like to try, such as sports teams or art classes, so they can learn new skills and discover new talents.

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