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Development milestones - your child at 5 years

All children are different, and they reach their developmental milestones at different times. If your child hasn’t reached every milestone, you might just need to give them a bit more time. But if you are concerned about your child’s development, talk to their doctor or teacher, or a child health nurse.

Your preschooler needs a lot of sleep. If your 5 year old no longer has day-time naps, they still need 10 to 13 hours of sleep at night. If you have to wake them most mornings and they are cranky or overtired during the day, your child may need more sleep.

Physical and skills development

Play is an important way for your child to learn. Preschoolers continue to enjoy and develop skills in:

• playing make-believe or ‘pretend’ games
• singing, dancing and acting
• skipping, jumping backwards and jumping while running
• throwing, kicking and catching balls
• swinging and climbing

At home, your 5 year old will find things like dressing, going to the toilet, taking a bath and cleaning their teeth (under supervision) are all becoming easier. They will use forks and spoons confidently and may use knives for simple tasks.

They will also be improving in their fine motor skills, such as using paper clips or child-safe scissors, writing letters and their name and drawing pictures of people with 8 to 10 body parts.

Your child may also help with simple chores like setting the table.

Emotional milestones

Your child is likely to be relaxed about being away from you, particularly if it’s to play with a friend. By now, your child will be learning about the value of friends and will feel good when their friends are happy.

They might start to behave in a way that supports friendship, such as by saying ‘sorry’ and agreeing to rules. But even children who are happy to be away from their parents for short periods can feel anxious about starting preschool or school.

Read about starting school.

While your preschooler might sometimes seem demanding, you’ll probably notice that they throw fewer temper tantrums as their ability to communicate improves.

Thinking and communication milestones

Preschoolers are learning the difference between fantasy and reality. They learn and use hundreds of more words, in sentences of 6 or more words and can take turns in a conversation with a group of people and tell jokes. They start to tell stories about what’s happened to them, although the details may not be in the right order.

By 5 years of age, preschoolers can usually:

• understand the meaning of opposites (‘high’ and ‘low’, ‘dark’ and ‘light’)
• identify numbers and letters out of order
• count to 10
• talk about ideas and feelings
• identify several colours
• use more connecting words such as ‘when’ and ‘but’ and adjectives like ‘funny’ or ‘pretty’
• understand and start to use words to explain more complex emotions, like ‘confused’ or ‘disappointed’
• use words to explain what’s happening in their brains, like ‘don’t know’ or ‘can’t remember’

Some children start to talk about events in the past, present and future by their fifth birthday. Your 5 year old might start to hide the truth or even tell lies, which is not unusual. For example, they may say, ‘I didn’t do it’ if they think they’ll be in trouble for something they did.

They are starting to recognise the difference between boys and girls and might play ‘mums and dads’. Their curiosity about their bodies and those of their friends may lead to child sex play. This is normal, but if you are concerned about how your child acts or talks about sex play or their body, talk to your doctor or another qualified health professional.

Find out more about speech development in children.

Helping your child’s development

Your child learns by exploring and experiencing new situations, so it helps if you can let them do so, even when they seem to struggle a bit. Be enthusiastic and excited about your child starting school and try not to let them know if you have any worries about their starting or settling in to school.

You can also:

• encourage play that uses energy — rough-and-tumble play and outdoor running and ball games
• make time for creative play with paint, pens or crayons; music, musical instruments or toys; dress-ups and dancing; and other crafts
• read, sing and recite rhymes with them
• encourage them to play games that help develop social skills like sharing and taking turns
• cook with your child

If you’re concerned

If you have questions or concerns about your child’s development, talk to your doctor or child health nurse. You should contact your doctor if your 5-year-old:

• isn’t developing conversational skills
• doesn't seem to understand three-part commands such as ‘pick up your book, put it on the table and sit down with me’
• doesn’t want to play with other children
• seems to be afraid, unhappy or sad a lot of the time
• acts aggressively for no apparent reason
• is easily distracted and can’t concentrate on anything for more than a few minutes
• doesn’t pretend during play
• trips over a lot, can’t stand on one foot for more than 2-3 seconds, or isn’t getting better at catching an object
• doesn’t seem to be able to use small objects like pencils or child-safe scissors
• can’t eat or dress themselves
• can’t copy or draw simple pictures
• has no clear preference for their right or left hand
• has trouble seeing or hearing
• can no longer do things they could do at one time

Vaccinations

There are no vaccinations due when your child turns 5. Read more about vaccinations and when they're due.