Helping Your Teen With Angst

Don't Take It Personally

• When your teen yells that he hates you or slams the door in your face, it's hard not to internalize the negative feelings that go with that rejection. But as a parent, it's important that you remember that it's not personal, says clinical psychologist Peter Sheras in an article for The University of Virginia Magazine. Most teens go through a period where they feel alone or misunderstood and they often lash out at those closest. Your teen doesn't really hate you, and while he might need cooling off time, he doesn't really want you to leave him alone. He is simply experiencing emotions with which he's ill-equipped to deal.

Ask Questions

• When you try to find out why your teen is stressed, sad and angry, you might try to talk to her, only to be shut out with a one-word answer. Asking the right questions can help your teen open up and start a conversation about her angst. For instance, instead of "How was your day?" try "What was the best part about your day?" That way, your teen needs to give a better explanation than just "Fine." If your teen still doesn't want to talk, let her know that you're there to listen when she's ready. Avoid prying, or worse, giving her a short window of time for communication before you give up.

Choose Your Battles

• If you're not loving the way your teen has been dressing, you hate his taste in music or you're concerned about his choice in friends, choose only the battles that are the most important. After all, you can ignore the clothes and give him headphones -- but you may need to have a serious talk about his friends. Your teen is more apt to listen up when you're not a constant, nagging force in his life.

Offer Outlets

• Raychelle Cassada Lohmann, MS, LPC, writing for Psychology Today, suggests helping your teen find a way to turn anger into something more productive. Offer ample opportunities to help your teen transform her anger via creative outlets, sports teams, social groups and anything else. That way, she isn't spending excess time on her own, dwelling on her negative feelings. By learning new skills and venting her emotions, she builds confidence while finding a satisfying way to deal with her angst.

Medical Intervention

• If your teen's angst is more than just normal teen behavior and is accompanied by symptoms like social withdrawal, excessive sadness, mood swings, difficulty sleeping, a sudden change in physical appearance and sliding grades at school, see your doctor for a referral to a mental health professional who can help. Angst can actually be teenage depression, which is treatable through coping mechanisms and prescription drug therapy.