What to Say if Your Child Is Not Sure He Believes in God

Spiritual exploration is a normal part of a child̵7;s life, with spiritual activity highest in the teen years, according to a July 2010 report from the Barna Group, a research organization studying the faith and spiritual practices in the United States. From a young age, kids may try to make sense of things spiritually, according to Dr. Nancy Carlsson-Paige, Ph.D., an education professor at Lesley University, but keep in mind that your child's perspective on spirituality might be different from yours.

  1. Spiritual, but Not Religious

    • The education system discourages spiritual expression and exploration, explains Carlsson-Paige. An educator̵7;s reluctance to hear and allow spiritual expression might leave your child struggling with whether God exists or not. If religious practice and your faith are important to you, hearing that your child isn̵7;t sure that she believes in God could cause you some distress. It could even cause you to mount a campaign to force your child to admit that God exists. When you accept that kids investigate various spiritual perspectives, you can work with this from a positive viewpoint and build a deeper connection with your child.

    Starting the Conversation

    • Listening to your child and asking questions can open the door to talking about spiritual beliefs. You can ask, ̶0;What do you believe? Do you have an idea about how we all got here?̶1; Don̵7;t interrupt your child and try to convince him of your beliefs. Meet your child̵7;s thoughts with acceptance and curiosity. If your child asks about what you believe or how you practice your faith, answer those questions honestly, writes psychotherapist and Buddhist Dharmachari Nagaraja in an article about childhood spirituality for The Mother Company. If there are discrepancies between what you say you believe and how you act, consider and address those issues honestly without becoming defensive. For example, if you don't attend services regularly, you should explain to your child that you are lax in your attendance, but still engage in prayer often and are going to try to become more active in your church in the future.

    Supporting Exploration

    • If your child wants to know what other faith traditions believe, support the inquiry by researching together. You can attend events at other places of worship, ask questions of people practicing various faith traditions and talk about what you experience together. Read from the spiritual writings of various traditions to see what they say and how they differ or agree with your faith perspective. You can compare various faith perspectives to see their commonalities and differences.

    Teens and the Church

    • If your family includes church attendance as a part of your faith practice, you could address the reasons many teens leave the church as revealed in 2011 Barna reports. In these reports, teens said that many Christians are too exclusive, shallow, antagonistic to science, judgmental and unfriendly to those expressing doubt. Help your child explore how to reconcile these critiques with her spiritual beliefs. Help your church create a more relevant faith experience for kids. Accept that your child might come back around to a deeper faith in God because of the exploration, or he could choose a faith perspective that differs from yours.

    2. Previous:

    Next:

    • The Facts on Becoming a Woman for Girls
      No matter what you call it, going through puberty and "becoming a woman" can have an impact on a girls life in many ways. Parents may also find it uncomfortable to deal with the physical and emotional changes a child endures during puberty.
    • The Average Bedtime for Teenagers
      Few teenagers get the recommended nine hours of sleep a night as recommended by the National Sleep Foundation. Late night texting, homework and television can result in sleep deprivation. Teens often have irregular sleep patterns, sleeping in on the
    • Head Lice