Does Conservative Parenting Lead to a Positive Self-Esteem?

Though it's obvious that positive self-esteem in children is essential to their development into strong adults, getting there isn't nearly as clear-cut. KidsHealth.org describes positive self-esteem in a child as "feeling capable while also feeling loved." As a conservative parent, you may have certain family rules and values that you expect your child to embrace. When you enforce these expectations with a loving and respectful heart, your child is likely to develop a positive self-esteem. But if you parent with a distant "what I say, goes," mentality, your child may have trouble experiencing a sense of self-worth.

  1. Definition of Conservative Parenting

    • According to Dictionary.com, a conservative is someone who adheres to tradition -- whether in religion, family customs or wider cultural tradition. They may also associate themselves with the conservative political party. Generally, according to LiveScience, conservative parents are less permissive than liberal parents. Conservative parents are more likely to set rigid rules, use punishment and emphasize obedience in the parent-child relationship. A conservative parent may require a child to attend religious services, live by certain family values or behave in a way traditional to their sex.

    Authoritative Versus Authoritarian Parenting

    • WebMD lists three main parenting styles: Authoritarian, authoritative and permissive. Conservative parents fall more on the authoritarian/authoritative side of the spectrum. Authoritarian parents tend to establish themselves as superior to children, dismissing the feelings and concerns of a child in favor of enforcing strict rules and sometimes physical discipline. Because authoritarian parents often withhold love, a child has trouble developing good self-esteem because she feels unworthy of love. On the other hand, an authoritative parent sets rules and clear consequences, but gives plenty of love and affection. An authoritative parent also strives to understand a child's motives and collaborates with a child to solve problems. Authoritative parents often raise children with high self-esteem, because these children learn how to work through their problems alone (instead of simply being punished), while also feeling worthy of love and respect.

    Building Healthy Self-Esteem

    • Authoritative parents who blend structure with love tend to raise children with high self-esteem, says KidsHealth.org. To cultivate your child's self-esteem, emphasize the positive. If your child earned a poor grade, don't immediately punish him -- state that you're glad he tried his best, and you'll work on the subject with him to improve. Be affectionate. Physical touch helps a child feel both safe and worthy of love. Curtail your own negative self-talk, too. Children notice when parents are overly critical of themselves, and they often internalize these same behaviors.

    Factors That Hurt a Child's Self-Esteem

    • Some elements of conservative parenting may harm a child's self-esteem. Physical punishment has been proven ineffective in the long run. According to the American Psychological Association, while corporal punishment may immediately stop bad behavior, it can increase aggressiveness and antisocial behavior in children. Also, as children become desensitized to it, parents often spank harder, which can escalate into physical abuse. Another harmful factor of authoritarian parenting, according to Families.com, is only expressing approval when a child earns specific accomplishments. This leads a child to believe that she is only worthy of love when she "wins," which causes her to be hypercritical of herself.

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