Six Principles of Effective Parenting

Clear and Specific Communication

• Effective communication proves vital to a successful relationship with your child. You must tailor your communication to the mentality of your child, so that he can understand your message. Also, you must give specific instructions or examples, so that your child doesn't make the wrong choices due to confusion or ignorance. If you expect your child to behave well during a trip to a store, you should speak to him, one-to-one, about what he needs to do to behave well, such as holding your hand or staying close by at all times and avoiding touching items without asking permission.

Consistency

• Consistency is key as an effective parent; yet, some parents might struggle with it. From the rules you make to the way you enforce them, you must be consistent. You might have a house rule that no texting is allowed at the dinner table. However, if you fail to enforce the rule when your teenager is texting covertly during dinner while you and your husband are trying to have a discussion, you can't expect your rule of no texting during dinner time to prove effective. Even though it takes time and effort, effective parents strive for consistency.

Logical Discipline

• Logical discipline -- discipline that's fair and related to the child's misbehavior -- is a cornerstone of effective parenting. If a teen repeatedly breaks his curfew, you could alter the curfew to reflect the amount of time that he exceeded his curfew. A teen who has a curfew of midnight, but fails to come home until 1 a.m., would have to come home at 11 p.m. -- or one hour earlier -- the next time he goes somewhere. Effective parenting and natural consequences also work well together. Natural consequences allow the child to experience the natural result of his actions. If a child refuses to eat dinner at meal time, the parent can remove his plate and tell him that he can eat at the next meal, which is breakfast. The natural consequence is temporary hunger. However, natural consequences are not appropriate for situations that would result in the endangerment of the health or safety of your child. For example, if your child repeatedly rides his bike in the street, you shouldn't allow him to do so until a car hits him.

Immediate Responses

• Effective parents deliver discipline or rewards immediately to help their child associate their specific behavior with a reward or a disciplinary action. If a parent asks his child to clean her room before he gets home from work and the child doesn't do it, the parent should respond with some type of logical discipline to show the child that choosing to ignore parental requests is unacceptable.

Compassion

• Compassionate parenting can boost children's self-esteem and comfort levels and teach them to view situations in a positive way. To show compassion means to take the time, each day, to sit down and listen to what your child has to say. If your child is worried or stressed, avoid judging her. Instead, ask her questions to help her think critically about her situation and discover a solution to her challenges. Compassion also means to express affection to your child by giving her a hug or saying "I love you." A compassionate parent will take the time to uncover the root of her child's troubling actions and discuss alternative scenarios, rather than to discipline her without discussion.

Individualize

• Parents who individualize the way they treat each child are more effective than those who take a one-size-fits-all approach to everything from discipline to communication. What works with one child may not work with another. One child might be easily motivated by praise, while another might only respond well to tangible rewards. Or one child may need more structure to complete tasks, while her sibling functions well independently with little intervention.