Emotional Maturity in Preschoolers

Preschoolers develop at a fast and exciting pace in all realms -- physically, intellectually and emotionally. Developmental psychologists since Erik Erikson have studied emotional maturity in children, including preschoolers, to set normal developmental benchmarks of their emotional maturity.

  1. Foster Independence

    • At around age 3, your preschooler may appear disruptive, as he engages in behaviors such as such as walking away, refusing to eat certain foods and only wanting to wear outfits he has chosen. Tantrums may fly when he doesn't get what he wants. An occasional meltdown isn't a major problem, though, because he's really just asserting his independence and learning to exercise his own will. To optimize his emotional development, allow him to act as independently as possible, such as letting him put on his own clothes, while imposing limits that keep him safe.

    Praise Good Motives

    • Between the ages of 3 to 5, children learn that their behaviors, whether positive or negative, affect others. Part of this process may be to bombard you with questions as they gather information about how the world works. Exercise patience by validating your child's need to know by taking the time to pay attention to her and give her developmentally appropriate answers. Discourage negative or manipulative behaviors, such as bullying, and praise cooperative play, initiative and empathy.

    Build Self-Confidence

    • By the time he is ready to enter kindergarten, your child will already have some sense of how competent or incompetent he believes himself to be. Help to build your preschooler's competence by encouraging him as he learns kindergarten readiness tasks, such as washing his hands after using the bathroom, blowing his nose and following simple two-step directions. Keep in mind that friends and teachers play an important role in fostering your child's self-confidence as his social circle widens.

    Considerations

    • While developmental psychologists warn that children with overly restrictive or punitive environments may develop emotional problems, such as consistently expressing shame, guilt or an inferiority complex, understand that your preschooler is quite resilient. You don't have to worry that losing your patience on one or two occasions will emotionally scar her. The best teaching comes from modeling good behaviors, rather than lecturing her. If you want your child to learn to share, for example, you should share something with her first.

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