How to Unspoil Your Child and Teach Him Responsibility
My ex-husband has spoiled our son to the point where he doesn't seem to appreciate anything. This makes it hard when I take him fun places and all he can say is 'that's not cool Mommy...I wanna go some place cool'. He begs for toys at the store, video games when I pick him up after daycare, and even expensive items like a dirt bike. My son is 6-years-old. He should not act this way and often times his spoiled attitude ruins our fun day. However, I've found ways to unspoil my son and help us both enjoy the little things in life. He has also learned some responsibility along the way.
Instructions
Explain to your child that money does not come easily, therefore, toys and fun things need to be earned. Whenever my son wants something, he has to earn it. This helps to unspoil him because he knows that he isn't just going to get whatever he wants when he wants it. I have him do chores around the house to help me out such as sweeping, putting dishes in the dishwasher, or picking up his room. He knows that if he does something good to help out, he can usually get something small. I do not spoil him and let him get any toy he wants; it must be something little so that he learns some responsibility. Have your child help you donate toys and items he doesn't play with anymore. This can be a task, because a child will see his toys, even if he hasn't used them in awhile, and want to play with them. Tell your child that if he gets rid of a few items, he will be helping out other children less fortunate than him. Unspoiling your child means teaching him that other children are not as lucky as he is. Your child needs to learn to appreciate things in life. Spoiled children have a tough time with appreciation. Helping your child see that his life is really not so bad will encourage him to halt his spoiled behavior and think about how life could be if he was not so lucky to have what he has. Start a points or sticker system so your child understands that he has to earn a new toy or item. A points system helps to unspoil your child because he learns that he cannot just get anything he wants without earning it first. Create a chart in which your child must do certain things to earn stickers or points. Make a list of chores or behaviors that he must do in order to gain a sticker. Decide how many stickers a week your child must have in order to get a small toy. You can do this weekly or monthly depending on how much you want to spend on toys. Your child will learn responsibility in earning what he wants and will behave less spoiled when you go to the store or out in public because he already understands what is expected of him. Take your child somewhere you can both volunteer. When your child sees that people do not always get what they want in life and live worse than he does, he'll get rid of that spoiled attitude. Try volunteering at a local friendship table, a free medical clinic, a boys & girls club, or a food pantry and watch how quick your child's spoiled behavior changes. Seeing how hard other people have it always brings us back down to earth. Having your child see this at a young age will definitely unspoil him and help him to be grateful for what he has. When your child's spoiled attitude becomes too much, take away things that he enjoys. Whenever my son gets an attitude with me and starts behaving like a spoiled little man, I take away his video games. I warn him first, of course, so that he understands that if the spoiled behavior does not stop, he will have something taken away that means a lot to him. I tell him that he must earn the item back in order to be able to play again. Usually, this means that he must change his attitude and behave for at least an hour or more. Taking away his video games for an hour is pure torture for my son. His spoiled attitude usually changes pretty quickly and he learns to be grateful for the things he has because he knows they could be taken away in a heartbeat if he does not behave properly.
