Sudden Aggression & Anger in Children

Power Struggle

• Ask Dr. Sears says that children will often begin expressing aggressive behavior as a means to control their parents. Children whose tantrums are reinforced continue to tantrum, and increase the level of aggression when they feel necessary. The experts at Ask Dr. Sears recommend parents keep a positive attitude with children, and clearly explain expectations before tantrums occur. For instance, when entering a store, parents can say, "We are going in to buy groceries, not junk food or candy. I expect you to stay with me by the cart, and not ask for things we are not here to purchase." This clearly defines the expected behavior for the child, and can cut off aggressive tantrums before they begin.

Appropriate Anger Response

• Some children are not taught appropriate expressions of anger by their parents. Children model what they are taught, but if parents never model appropriate anger coping skills, it is hard for children to know what is acceptable and what is not. According psychologist and author Dr. Ana Nogales, children who express anger inappropriately need to be guided toward towards appropriate expressions of anger such as talking with a trusted friend, counting slowly when angry feeling begin to develop, and breathing deeply to keep anger at bay.

True Feelings

• According to an article published online by the Child Development Institute, a child's anger is often sadness in disguise. When a child experiences a loss or rejection he or she sometimes exhibit anger and aggression in response. The experts on the site recommend parents approach their child with love and acceptance in order to get to the root of the anger. If the child truly is feeling sad, or rejected then the parent can help their child deal with the true emotion, and move beyond the feelings of anger they have been harboring.

When to Get Help

• There is a point at which parents need to seek professional help for their child's anger. If there is no discernible cause of anger, and the child is continuing to have outbursts, parents should contact a medical professional. Some potential causes of irrational anger in children include potential abuse, bipolar disorder, and attention deficit hyperactive disorder. When a child's anger cannot be explained or alleviated, it is time to seek professional help in the best interest of the child.