Cool Ways to Teach Integrity to Middle Schoolers

Integrity, or the act of being true to yourself and to others, is one of the most important concepts that children can learn. It is also one of the most abstract and therefore difficult concepts to teach because its meaning can vary among people. Parents can help their middle school students understand the meaning of integrity, as well as how to apply it in their everyday lives, by following a few simple but effective methods.

  1. Define It

    • Because integrity is such an abstract concept, start by asking your child to tell you his own definition of integrity. This can be a formal definition or a list of examples of ways someone can display the value of integrity. After a few minutes, discuss his definition and examples with him, and then banter with examples and non-examples. ̶0;If I tell you that you̵7;re not allowed to eat any more cookies and then you sneak one when I̵7;m not looking, are you acting with integrity? How about if you knock something over on a store shelf and put it back without being told?̶1; Point out that having integrity means that your child will do the right thing, even when no one is watching.

    Model It

    • A parent is a child̵7;s first teacher. If you want your child to learn how to act with integrity, you must apply it to your own life. As parents, be kind to your spouse or partner, family members and friends. Don̵7;t speak behind others̵7; backs or share gossip. Don̵7;t cheat or lie. Make honesty a priority and never ask your children to lie for you or for anyone else. Likewise, if you catch your child in a lie, don̵7;t let it slide; use it as a ̶0;teachable moment̶1; to ensure your child recognizes that there are consequences for actions.

    Reward It

    • From an early age, praise your child for his displays of integrity. If you see him helping a family member or friend without being asked or doing right when he could have done wrong because you weren̵7;t watching, offer up your appreciation. This doesn̵7;t have to be a material prize; instead, give him the chance to stay up a little later watching TV or a little more time on the computer; allow him to choose what̵7;s for dinner one night or let him skip doing one of his routine chores. Reinforcing his positive behavior will encourage him to continue to act with integrity as he matures, even when you̵7;re not around to see it.

    Use Pop Culture

    • If you and your middle schooler share a love of a specific TV show, movie or book, use scenes or dialogue to discuss whether the characters are acting with integrity. Ask questions such as, ̶0;How would you feel if a friend stole from you, just like that girl in the movie did?̶1; or ̶0;I bet that boy feels really sad that his friend betrayed him like that, don̵7;t you think?̶1; Discussing fictional scenarios that display the absence or presence of integrity will help your child make smart decisions when it comes to real life.

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