Parenting Techniques & How They Affect Children's Intimate Relationships

It is important that parents find the right parenting style with which to raise their children, as this can shape each child's future. Parents should carefully consider things like parental control and parental warmth, since they provide a healthy balance in the child's life. Children who have a positive relationship with their parents, while still having to follow rules, are more likely to develop healthy relationships in the future, reports extension specialist Kimberly Kopko, writing on the website of the Cornell Cooperative Extension.

  1. Uninvolved Parenting

    • Some parents do not pay much attention to their children and are neither demanding nor warm. These parents tend to allow their children to do whatever they please and are unconcerned about their children's whereabouts or actions. Children who end up in these situations tend to struggle with self-regulation and can exhibit impulsive behaviors, suggests Kopko. In an education.com article that excerpts points from D.H. Sailor's 2004 book, "Supporting Children in Their Home, School, and Community," it is warned that these teens can also behave aggressively toward others, have low self-esteem and become anti-social because of this neglect, which can hinder their intimate relationships in the future.

    Permissive Parenting

    • Parents that are overly permissive generally treat their children in a warm manner, but do not provide the structure that young people need. These parents do not take an active role in shaping their children's behavior, but rather act as a secondary resource. Those who grow up in this parenting style are likely to be unaware of the consequences of their actions, which can lead to problems with self-control, notes Kopko. Eventually, this can damage their relationships with their peers, since children who grow up in this environment can become egocentric.

    Authoritarian Parenting

    • An authoritarian parent is incredibly strict and is prone to punishing a child if he does not follow the rules. These parents do not engage in discussion with their children, but rather impose rules that the child must follow without question, reports assistant professor Dr. Javiette Samuel, writing on the Tennessee State University Cooperative Extension website. This style can cause females to lack motivation, which leads to them depending on their parents for everything, while it can lead to males becoming angry and defiant. Authoritarian parenting can also cause low self-esteem and anxious behavior around peers, causing children raised in this manner to act with hostility if they become frustrated, according to the Sailor excerpts. All of this can hinder personal relationships, as children who grow up with this type of parenting can be inflexible thinkers and difficult to get to know.

    Authoritative Parenting

    • Those who become authoritative parents are warm toward their children, but also impose boundaries and provide consequences when those boundaries are crossed. This encourages children to act independently, but also to maintain awareness of their actions. Because this style of parenting encourages discussion between parents and children, it helps children to understand that their opinions are valued, states Kopko. As a result, these children have the ability to maintain relationships because they are socially competent, aware that the viewpoints of others have legitimacy and have internalized moral standards, as excerpted from Sailor on education.com.

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