How to Treat Your Child's Imaginary Friend

If your child has an imaginary friend, she is in good company. Imaginary friends help children with empathy and self-control and with coming to terms with self-control, discipline, authority, right and wrong, consequences, change and anxiety, according to the New York University Langone Medical Center, which also says approximately 65 percent of young children invent imaginary friends. In spite of the positive benefits of imaginary friends, you may wonder how to treat your child's imaginary friend. Politely. Anita Gurian, a clinical assistant professor of child and adolescent Psychiatry at the NYU School of Medicine advises parents to go along with the relationship, showing respect for a child's invisible friend without hesitating to set limits when the imaginary friend's demands become disruptive.

Instructions

    • 1

      Relax and enjoy your child's imagination, advises Eileen Kennedy-Moore, PhD, writing for "Psychology Today." Talk with your child about the friend as you would any other friend. The online Fisher-Price Parenting Guide recommends that you respect the friendship and not try to force your child to admit his friend is only pretend. Play along when you can, such as setting a place at the table for his imaginary friend if your child invites him to dinner. While most children may know their invisible friends are pretend, Kennedy-Moore suggests these friends represent " 'bemagination' ̵1; something partway between belief and imagination."

    • 2

      Treat your child's imaginary friend with respect. It may be long-term relationship. Some imaginary friendships last for years. Do not tease your child about her friend, and ask family members and friends to also refrain from teasing or belittling your child for having an imaginary friend. And while it may be tempting at times, do not use the imaginary friend as a tool to control your child's behavior. Karen Stephens, director of Illinois State University Child Care Center, advises that you keep discipline and play separate -- avoid dictating the imaginary friend story line or behavior for your own purposes. Let your child control that story.

    • 3

      Short-circuit any attempt on your child's part to blame her misbehavior on the imaginary friend. Let her know she must pay the consequences for her friend's misbehavior so it is in her best interest to control the imaginary friend's behavior. If the imaginary friend's demands become too disruptive, it's OK to set limits. For instance, tell your child that the car is full today so the imaginary friend will have to wait at home or that company is coming for dinner and you need all the chairs for your guests so the imaginary friend will have to eat in your child's room or the kitchen.

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